Good morning fellow #Netizens. A dear friend asked for my assistance to help regarding a #romancescam a friend is caught in for a long time. This is not the first time others seek aid from moi regarding shitty circumstances of the inhumane nature. Romance scams, bullying, and other horrors we inflict upon each other are not healthy ways to stay alive above the curve of poverty.
My primary preventive advice is as follows: If you meet someone and begin a possible serious relationship (be it personal, business, or charitable) you have an obligation for your own self-esteem to make sure what they are telling you is for real. The raking up of from the muck of creeps, perverts, con artists, mentally ill addicts, power tripping sex magnets and other sickos has increased exponentially across the planet. This may be merely a number crunching event (more humans, more weirdos) and/or it maybe due to social media, instant text messaging, and other connections via the world wide web.
What i do know is this caca knows no boundaries from income to religiosity to style of insanity. The level of vulnerability of these victims i am told about seem to possess one over riding sameness – they are swallowed by latent fear turned up to full torque and an acute neediness. The bitter pill is no one is purely innocent in these circumstances. I suppose i have a difficult time relating to being abused as my universe is serene and fearless. Thirty plus years without mood altering substances means one’s vision is usually fairly clear.
If a scumbag or a nice desperado directs his attention at me he is probably going to suffer exposure. If necessary i have no problem dropping a dime to inform authorities when #sexuallyharassed. Plus, for your own protection and privacy, act with common sense. If someone asks you for money and you only know them from the Net – do not do this. If someone you meet in person or on-line says they are not married run a check to see the divorce papers (easy to do). This is simple stuff.
Bring your family and friends into the mix as soon as possible. We all need backboards, soundboards, and the support of others who know us. Love is blind. Desperate love is blind, dumb, and deaf. Feeling lost and alone is a terrible combo and a crudy way to move about the planet, yet a perfect scenario to attract a con. If you think I am above this caca, i am not.
In establishing any relationship i work slowly, sometimes intently, and take time to observe and evaluate. Yet, remember in my trade and experience i ask questions, a lot of questions, and i am damn good at fact checking. If someone asks me to marry them in dire straights (their end) or nearly instantly tells me they love me it is not real.
In the faith of #Islam there is no dating and so this practice of never getting to know a potential mate provides a fertile field for foolishness, dull combos, and the vapor of falsehoods. (wikiislam.net/wiki/Muslim_Statistics_-_Marriage). This is why arranged marriages are not unusual, or the use of a match maker, yet these methods do not guarantee a happy union. It is also why i am an advocate of sex education and safe houses for women and kids, and men too. There are inherent socially accepted #domesticabuses prevalent around the world and while the stats are reduced if educated all numbers tell a horrific story of how violence is considered okey dokey.
The power of #love, be it between a man and a woman, or with a higher power, is stifled when truth is forgotten and fear rules. None of us are fully present to exist in paranoia, abuse, or isolation. I maybe a jungle hermit, yet i am in daily contact with people who are supportive and kindly free to be themselves without being hung-up in negatives.
#Fellowship is the basis of compassion. If your sober gut signals someone is a basturd, this is the inner voice of a power greater than yourself notifying you. If you feel trapped as a victim in a society where physical and emotional violence are prevalent reach out and refuse to become part of generational victimization. #Empowerment cannot operate in a vacuum. There are victim help organizations in nearly every corner of the world. https://www.unodc.org/ngo/list.jsp
For me meditation is listening to God and prayer is thanking God. #Mindfulness requires self-understanding without exhibiting narcissism. I am fortunate.
Trust in the world we inhabit is an honor to bestow, not a gift to give away because of neediness or established social mores geared for suppression and victimization.
I also always suggest victims seek professional help to sort out their angst of shame and blame, otherwise westerners become members of Prozac Nation, and for those in violent prone cultures the prognosis is far worse.